Sex Is A Drug, Drugs Are My Sex

Some people get high off pharmaceutical chemicals, some people get a high off purchasing large amounts of Gucci bags and Calvin Klein underwear.. Me? I get high off of getting pussy.

My drug of choice is the vagina, I’m addicted to the labia.

Popping off inside the warm confines of the vagine is my opioid, my heroin. It helps me forget about all my pain and woes.

When the sugar walls clamp on my moderately thick male member it’s as if I just took a big hit of some bomb ass kush. It makes me feel alive. When she rides me with conviction, I feel divine. When I see her raven black hair, her mischievous smile, I find peace. When I take a whiff and the smell of her lust reches my lungs, I don’t wanna die. Goddamn, I don’t want the high to ever stop. Fuck.

But the problem with all drugs is eventually you get hooked. Like a narcotic Wall St. broker looking to get his next fix of the booger sugar, all I can think about is when will I get my next dose and how.

To quote King Push:
“24/7, 365, pussy stays on my mind”

You’re my drug. Pale or tanned. Blonde or brunette. Busty or flat. I just wanna mate. Let me get you drunk and let’s get lost in a sea full of pubis. Make me come alive (innuendo intended).

And if I can’t get it then cannabis and benzos are pretty tight too. If only intercourse helped me sleep or digest food better though.

What Might Have Been

I been playing the good ol’ “What If?™” game in my head recently. Yes, that game where you beat yourself up for past mistakes and wasted opportunities.

I am not one for regrets, but I sometimes can’t help but wonder if I missed out on something life changing. If you guessed earlier that this is gonna be about women.. you are correct, jerk.

What If?™ that beautiful woman you never properly had the sack to hit it off with was gonna lead you to the best next six months of your life?

What If?™ you were gonna finally find your wholesome monogamy worthy lady and you never scared her off by posting videos of yourself doing drugs and fucking hoes on your Instagram?

What If?™ the woman you sent your sausage pics to was actually really into you and you blew it because now she thinks you’re a perverted fuck?

What If?™ I could stop and enjoy life for a moment and not piss off every person I meet?

What If?™ I was just another boring normative kid? One that has zero personality, a mediocre girlfriend that doesn’t love him and friends who pretend to like him? Just another idiot living in the Matrix, plugged in and too delusional to realize how fucked up his life is?

What If?™

It’s 1:37 AM, probably not gonna be able to sleep and dream of perky blondes. As usual.

Fuck.

 

Deep In The Trenches

Been a while since I posted here.. kept ya waiting huh?

I am gonna share with you some realizations I had in my mind recently after some conversations with my lovable yet clueless friends.

Men are easily the most masochistic gender. Not that they have that much competition in that department considering there are
only TWO genders, but yeah.

Men love to be hurt, that’s why they keep enlisting to fight in the great war that takes place in the battlefield that is love.

You march on to battle, armed with your slightly above average dong hoping for a victory only to be shot through the heart by a Ilsa, She-Wolf of the SS looking broad. Yikes.

A rational man (get it?) would probably call it quits and never go into that battle again after such a nasty incident. He would retire. Get a nice house, a car, a 20 year old nympho secretary and a Gym membership, but noooo.

You see, men are not rational. Not most of em, anyway. Not the ones I meet in this soft ass generation. They ALWAYS keep coming back for more. They love the thrill of the fight. It’s not the crushing defeat and emasculating loss they like, it’s the fight itself and the potential of epic victory. A mighty war all in the name of pussy. They take the good with the bad all in the hope of conquering the infamous snatch and making it their own. Taming the lion and eating it out.

Problem is.. very few of the soldiers in this war are ready for such a task. You try to warn them but they never listen. Never have, never will.

Men are men. Boys will be boys. And boys will always lose to women on the battlefield of love. They might win the first act, maybe even the second..

But eventually some young big titty berserker will knock their ass back into submission and step on the balls they once had.

Oh how quickly does one go from busting down dem sugar walls to holding your masters purse at the mall. Love is a motherfucker. When it’s the love of a man at least.

GENTLEMEN, READY YOUR WEAPONS.. TIME TO GO ANOTHER ROUND. ON TO BATTLE!