OnlyFans Hoe With V.D. That Holds Cat Hostage

Well, you know the site isn’t getting views this month if I talk about women. Not that I get paid at all so IDK why I care. Okay, so bitches..

Ahem.. Bitches.

What’s the deal with these new age OF slooties? You know.

The TOP 0.0000000069% in the bio.

The obsession with Florida rental housing.

The unspecified V.D. on their pitch black poontang.

It really bothers me, man. This whole OF shit. Not because I’m a prude. Women are doomed and zogged anyway. I mean, whatever happened to free spirit bitches who Snapchat you their pussy for FUN? And lust? And as a way to upset their father? THE GOOD OL DAYS.

Now its just buy me a Starbucks xoxo

I got 1000 bodies xoxo

I have five cats and can’t marry xoxo

Also even worse are the cunts that promise nudes but only do hand bra pics.

I can find that on IG for a free wankie thank you very much.

BAIT AND SWITCH!

Let’s discuss this economy.

Fucking disgrace. Maybe a fiat currency collapse is indeed imminent.

I wish I died in a nuclear war whilst in the middle of getting sloppy jallopy head from a busty redhead or a punk rock scene girl with medium pierced tits and a huge clapping ass.

I hate the US government.

Instagram is very gay (happy).

My balls hurt.

The point is society is declining so all we can aspire to do is sext sex workers and bait free nudes from them and get money.

Honestly, is there even money in this e-hookering? Like real money?

They all seem broke anyway always talking about buy my dinner and shit.

Financial freedom my swollen nut.

I remember when sluts just went to the local party, got xanned out and gangbanged by the football team, had their Polaroids passed around and carried on with their life. Like Your Mom.

With that being said, much respect to OF slags that stay sane and nice despite their soul sucking adventures. The true top 1% after Rockefeller bloodlines.

I will now NOT JERK OFF BECAUSE I HAVE SCRIPTS TO WRITE.

Pseudo-Rich Life

It’s 8 PM.

I’m bored and wanna go out. I anxiously approach the closet to pick out fashionable attires and open it, a gay midget jumps at me and claws my face!

I punch his tiny dick and kick him out a window. It’s a 7 story fall. I proceed and carefully pick out a fashionable attire since I am going out for some fine dining.

I put on a polo shirt, Clarks shoes and blue jeans.

Me and my homie roll out to the restaurant owned by a lame B-list TV chef. His food is good.

On the way there, I see a weesh nerd with low muscle mass and a mask.

I yell homophobic insults towards him and bully him. He flips me off timidly and runs away. We laugh.

Pull up to the spot.

Eat fine ass lamb fillets.

Smoke Cuban cigars.

Done and done. We major.

We leave at 1 AM and tip the waiter decently. He is happy.

Now it’s the AM, time to harass hot women online and ignore horny girls in the DM until they send me nudes. Can’t sleep. Still hungry.

Dean Martin time.

Got blocked twice but there’s an alluring Russian. Hm.