Lana Del Rey Part 3

I heard the pleas worldwide, millions have been waiting for this moment

“Please Mr. Insomniac, we need another one”

What could THIS possibly mean?

Of course this could only mean one thing

It’s time

Ladies, clean up your wet panties

It’s time for Lana Del Rey Part III

Yes indeed, I have returned for another part of my infamous Lana Del Rey analysis, mockery and obsession series… BUT THIS TIME, with a twist

I am not alone

I have asked for help from a very special someone

A very sexy someone

A very busty and high IQ someone

Someone that knows Lana Del Rey firsthand as a hot and green-eyed super fan

She will help me understand what is it about Lana Del Rey that appeals to the masses and excites the crotches and ears of men and female alike

In this mostly wholesome piece, we will hear for the first time from the perspective of a beautiful genius what makes the lady brain tingle in respect to Sparkling Jump Rope Queen

Without further purple intro, I present to you my convo with the lovely Ms. AA

“R: Tell me how you were first introduced to Lana and what drew you in?

A: I found Lana in 2012 when Video Games came out, it played on the radio and her voice was what immediately drew me in at first. I didn’t understand English back then but I thought her music was so emotive so I could enjoy and understand foreign music for once. The Baroque/Dream Pop style was very different to the other stuff here in Eastern Europe. Felt unique. Her music videos on the TV channels were good and I loved her aesthetics and style. The dark romanticism is popular here in Romania, our romantic literature is infused with tragedy and melancholic folklore, and I got to view this familiar theme under this direction I’d never seen before with the addition of patriotic motifs and Old Hollywood/1950s Americana glam.

R: Could you relate to the lyrics of Lana on a personal level? If so, in which way? What’s your reaction to the world she is portraying?

A: A lyric I always liked is ‘you’re my religion, you’re how I’m living’ because my faith is very important to me. I liken you to it, because of how I worship and admire you. Devout in a way that only you know about, and I do pray for you too. I think our love has a lot of religious elements incorporated in it.

(Personal note: She is such a good girl)

R: I really like that answer.

A: Other lyrics such as ‘he hit me and it felt like a kiss’ have been trashed as romanticizing abuse when it’s actually evident to be Lana detailing her previous experiences with love. Her lyricism is embedded in her life and that’s what is responsible for her authenticity and relatability while others come off pretentious. Those who have been abused or who like certain dynamics in their relationship will relate. Ultraviolence is her best album, others might choose her later work where she uses intentional conversational storytelling. It’s more blatant and digestible there while Ultraviolence has those same aspects put through metaphors and is much more enjoyable. I like to relisten and pick apart those lines. I’m into that.

R: Interesting. What do you think about the huge Lanita fandom online? Does it attract certain women? Is it getting stereotypical to a point by now?

A: I don’t like Lana’s fandom. It’s not all bad but it got invaded by those who take her old Lizzie Grant lyrics too seriously. Tumblr girls love clinging onto those anorexic or DDLG themes from 2009, glorifying Lolita and etc.. it lately has been attracting daddy issues type girls much more than before. As an individual I like Lana, I don’t obsess over her or idolize her like a lot of her fans do. Her escapades and issues don’t irk me, just her vape usage that ruined her vocal range. I don’t care about her looks or fashion. She’s not that dark haired skinny girl from UV anymore and she will never reach that musical level again either. The art is immortalized and nothing will detract it.

R: Hard hitting answer. I enjoy this conversation.

A: Thank you!

R: If you had to describe me by three Lana songs.. what would they be and why?

A: Religion, Shades of Cool and Honeymoon. Mostly because of their sound. The cinematic, romantic and smooth production. The sound of Honeymoon matches your dominant, older and relaxed confident vibe. Shades of Cool lyrically has some things I compare you with. It’s also my favorite Lana song and you’re my favorite man so that might have sway. Religion, it’s softer and romantic while keeping the mystique the other songs have. The other side of you that is warm under all the strength and sternness. Honorable mention to Music To Watch The Boys to.

R: Based on what you know about me, what do you think interests me about Lana Del Rey and the mythos surrounding her?

A: I think aesthetics and attitudes are important to you, specifically the 50s and 60s. You like Mad Men, you like the days of old like The Sopranos, Godfather, Goodfellas. Lana’s music takes you back to that time without even taking into account her physical appearance/style or music videos. Her lyrics detail men like you minus the abuse and the trailer parks. Her music is sultry, romantic and sexual. You’re all that. Her music is contrasting to you in its femininity but so you at the same time. You’re not a nostalgic hopeless romantic girl, you’re the man she dreams of and centers her life around. It’s made for you.”

God, thank you for giving me this beautiful buxom girl that has a wonderfully functional and impressive brain. I enjoyed these insights so much even with the personal bias of being admired aside. I think this is perfect epilogue to my Lana Del Rey saga on this site.

We went from my musings and ramblings on the whole thing for years and years but now we have it officially certified and eloquently put.

What more can I say? Nothing to really add.

I love my girl. I will give her great orgasms for her contributions. Read and breed. Peace out, friends of humanity.

Eurovision 2025: TrashMania

Today is the national holiday for Satanic cocksuckers and low class Eurotrash mids masquerading as enjoyers of high art

The Eurovision of the past is long gone

The contest of days long gone is.. well, long gone

No more good to below-average songs randomly displayed on network TV to make you forget about regime changes and poor wages

That funny bunny was replaced by globohomo NWO propaganda and very shitty acts that are UGLY and SUCK

No more Push The Button, no more Spanish soul

Now it’s a breeding ground for queers who lick steers

Where Ukraine wins to spite boring Russians that don’t even watch the show

Where Israelis will probably get a 2nd place spot to make people forget that the show gives the spotlight and approval to loudmouth endorsers of rapists and fat brown terrorists

Whatever happened to Sergio Dalma? The strong, soulful type?

That was a Eurovision singer

Now it’s all fruitcakes and Jihadis

Why the fuck is the Middle East in this show anyway? Idiots

I will not waste another second on this rant, actually, I realized I am wasting time

I will resume watching The Penguin re-runs and eat a burger (with OLIVE OIL)

Fuck you if you enjoy the commie contest, choke on soy seeds and dick

Lana Del Rey Part 2

He was a troubled rebellious lad with a bad reputation and a way with words who is probably good at tying ropes, she was a run down borderline suicidal slice of potential heaven with the perfect lips for the playing on the skin flute. She was spoiled. He spoils. They fuck. She’s happy for the five minutes they got together. He’s a liar who means well. They will eventually explode into madness together. Match made in heaven.

That is the basic synopsis for almost every Lana Del Rey Mysterio song minus cocaine and without mentioning the daddy kink or Old Hollywood fetish. Kind of.

Which makes me raise the following question like Lana’s voice raises my weiner.. why are we (men) attracted to the things we know are ultimately bad for us?

I talk to girls that always bitch about their love for the toxic that ends up hurting them yet they keep going at it over and over.

But what about the guys that indulge these bitches and get their heart ruined from excessive fucking and bad breakups?

I hope those girls don’t read this.. (I hope they do because they can’t do shit about me using them as an idea xoxo)

Anyway, men have a lust for the wicked just like the chicas do. We like thinking we can take the crazy broad and change her and bring order into her world and be the big sexy hero of her life. Fucking superhero fantasy.

It’s like all those guys Lana dated before she started eating at Burger King. All allegedly cool and tough and dangerous until she realized deep down they were sweet and the illusion was killed. Doot doot dooot.

Almost as if she realized they were trying to do her good and that inner whore devil decision making side said cut it out you fuck. Can’t get that redemption arc yet.

That’s how you get a song like In My Feelings where Lana cries while masturbating and calls her ex lover a loser.

Is the poor boy really a loser? Maybe a retard, sure. Did he really think he can taste the nectar of the Pepsi Pussy and leave unharmed by drama?

Hope is a dangerous thing for a woman like Lana because she knows better but can’t do better. Fucked over by her own nature. Sad, sad, sad.

Deep down she loves the drama. And we love drama. No men is complete without being in love with a crazy cunt. It’s what makes us REAL MEN. A badge of honor. And a girl can’t live without the drama. You know this. Excitement beats boredom. And a Lana type chick is the perfect partner for a tango in a Hell of this making.

The Lanas of the world are like the mythical sirens. So beautiful yet deadly. You wanna listen, touch, kiss at the expense of your life and sanity.

Is it worth it?

Probably.

If I make “her” cry, I wanna use her tears as lube and hold her close. And then lie and be a fake and act Macho after falling in love so she never realizes that power she has over me. Then order sushi and read poetry or shoot rifles. And then fuck each other silly again. Me in my black suit. Her with the necklace and heels. Mm.

Hey man, God bless Lana Del Rey. Making good music, bringing weird girls into my life.

The Priestess of the Sad Girls. Queen of Coney Island. Motivator of Dirty Old Men.

Such grace. Such cinematic quality to each track. Art that will inspire even a monk to stimulation.

It takes a smart man to recognize her genius. She embodies the feminine spectrum to perfection.

I love her and God knows how much I like her fans.

By like her fans I mean I wanna impregnate those ladies after every conversation we end up having.

Is there a point to this?

This isn’t really about Lana Del Rey but it sure fits right?

Few© understand.

The Kanye West Question (Who KWoke?)

Kanye West.

Ye.

Kan, Louis Vuitton Don.

One of the most successful artists of all time.

A mogul.

A psycho.

All true depending who you ask.

But no matter what you think you know, all that matters is YOU KNOW who the fuck this brother is.

If you don’t know, yo ass better call somebody.

So recently, Yeezy been making the headlines as always..

The canola soaked lettuceheads and Satanic boot lickers have come for our boy yet again.

The favorite hobbies of the common bugman seem to be fellating Jamals and bashing West.

Why?

Is it because he is a Christian warrior in a Godless society? Threatening their wicked ideology?

Is it because they hated Donda 2?

Is it because he never dropped Throne 2?

Is it because he made Kim K into a super diva cunt we can’t get rid of?

Who KKKnows? Who cares? Fucking noise and bullshitery, all of it.

They hate him.

Now Ye is promoted as a right wing fanatic and uber weirdo. Yep. So is he our guy? Yeah. Cool in theory right?

Well not everyone agrees.

Some single digit IQs are mad an African Hebrew (self proclaimed) is taking up the white spot of culture leader.

Who cares? Again, whooo?

Some say he’s still an Illuminati puppet playing opp.

Who careeees?

He gives us what we need, it may not be what we want though. As long as he is waking up the normos. He’s an asset and the only non-cringe famous RWer figure. And his drip is immaculate.

He is battling the reptilian bankers and fake Hebrews (the ones that left the motherland and eat SOY).

Fucker is naming some demons, risking it all.

Doing more for the cause than yall on Twitter.

In this house, Kanye West is a hero.

Hope they don’t Kennedy him.

Yeezy 2024.

Insomniac Approved.

Evaporate if you disagree, bitch.

Lana Del Rey

The ultimate role model for your run-of-the-mill hoe masquerading as an intelligent bad bitch while living a double life as an ice cream demolishing SSRI abusing semen powered machine.

When Lana said her pussy tastes like Pepsi Cola ® it was a true paradigm shift. She hit a massive spike DDT on our collective generation.

The sheer bravery of this groundbreaking statement, good God.

With her sultry voice and imaginary daddy that sells her coke, nothing was the same. She is responsible for girls giving top notch head worldwide although she probably slurps penile tissue mildly nowadays because she’s already famous and doesn’t need to seduce agents.

I actually like LDR songs because I’m a melancholy man-whore (in theory).

Although in 2021, she needs to go on Keto.. fuck it, I’d still hit.

Why is it that pretty art whores use Lana as a roaring symbol of female excellence while their tight punani is getting invaded on the lowkey by bearded RW bodybuilders?

In the current landscape of sexual dynamics, there is nothing more relatable than a sad used up pretty girl with dead eyes and unfulfilled potential who allegedly lives her best life but yearns for more. Fame can’t replace all the dick that broke your heart and your shitty dad. That’s my perspective which is the only true way to look at it. Shut up and post a seductive selfie that will make me aroused and ruin my day.

She’s an infinitely more rich version of depressed 19 year old white bitches from the Burbs.

God bless Lana Del Rey. Even though she worships Satan and whatever.

Groupie Love

Ah, groupies..

A staple part of the iconic rock n’ roll mythos.

What is it that compels young nubile women to leave it all and run off with degenerate guitar playing junkies who sound good on vinyl?

It’s interesting really. They say goodbye to school and hit the road with some larger than life jerkoff that’s drowning in a sea of meaningless pussy just to be another pretty face in the harem.

They spend all day giving fellatio to the gang and rambling about their hopes and dreams to a man who pretends he gives a fuck who just wants ass.

She is in love, the rocker is her entire world. And he.. well, his ego is in love. He likes her very much, but his ego.. his ego is infatuated.

He feels so good. This girl wants his babies, obeys his every word and is a grade A lay. She will cut her wrist if he says so, goddamn.

So much power over her. He loves her. Sort of. Does he though? He writes songs about her, she fuels his creativity, he loves life when she’s around.. but what happens when she nags.. or her insecurity becomes too toxic?

He cares for her, but how much longer can the show go on? I am not a rockstar. I can sure as hell relate though.

Just a little bit. A bit too much.